Arrogance vs Confidence

I read a short essay from this book Buddhism In A New Light, and there is this essay about the differences between arrogance and confidence. Most of the time we have mistaken the confidence as arrogance and vice versa. There are a few points which I think the essay has highlighted in regards to this issue:

1. Judging one's self-worth by comparison with others' is arrogance.

2. Arrogance is egotism, confidence is altruism.

3. Confidence is to appreciate oneself.

4. The arrogant are insecure and needy.

5. Absolute superiority is a dangerous illusion.

Arrogance results from our inclination to judge our self-worth by comparison with others. Genuinely confident people, on the other hand, are aware of their intrinsic personal strength or merit. The most reliable source of confidence is our innate Buddha nature. 

Confidence makes genuine altruism possible. Confident people are free to care others and fight for their happiness with the hope that it exceeds even their own.

The essential difference between arrogance and confidence is one of quality and origin. Arrogance is needy and dependent on others, derived from comparison with the external. Confidence is free and independent of others, found and cultivated in the self. 

The points highlighted above will be helpful enough for us to reflect and evaluate ourselves, whether we are a person of confidence or arrogance. 

Love vs Friend

I remembered receiving this message from my junior about a year ago and I keep this message long enough in my mobile phone till now. I pretty like the message itself, it sounds true in certain sense. It is about love and friendship. 

"One day, Love and Friend go out together for a walk. Suddenly, Love falls into a deep river. Why? It is because Love is blind. So, Friend quickly jumps into the river to save Love. Why? This is because a good Friend will always be there whenever, wherever and whatever, we need. However, Friend can't find Love. Why? And this is because Love is too gentle, easy to lose when we do not take care of it. Finally, Friend gives up and leaves Love there. Why? Because, Friend will leave and ignore us if we do not know how to appreciate them."

It is beautifully written, and as I said, it is true in a way.  

Stories

It is about reading cases, the law cases. Puan Asnida mentioned a very strong statement today, which touches my heart. I really, later, took some times to really think of that. I have been reading cases the very first day I entered the law school. I faced difficulty in understanding the language used, the contents, the facts and the laws. I struggled to really get myself to finish reading cases just to face tutorials. As time passed, it has been just a habit - reading cases just for the sake of tutorials. Sometimes, cases are interesting in the sense that they are stories that we found funny or ridiculous. We laughed at certain parties involved for their stupidity that get them into trouble. Wait a minute, think of this. Do they really like to get themselves into all these shits? Are they happy when they are being sued? Are they fine with paying lots to lawyers just to gain something from the others, leaving the others suffered the losses? 

No, they don't, at least most of them not. Puan said, story - it is his or her story. They suffered and that's why they need legal assistance. They faced with all these difficulties and they pay to get their problems settled in a proper manner. Lawyers charged them excessively. We read their cases, we do not appreciate the problems that they are facing with. That shouldn't be the way, right? We should be more understanding, putting ourselves into their shoes. That's at least what I prefer to be in the future - that's at least how I defined myself as a good legal practitioner. That's what I want myself to be. 

People

So is about people. Not just ordinary people. People that have left footprints in my life. People that have gone in and the out of my life, time to time. It has been something that I have been facing for these 20 plus years, but why am I still not get used to it. Nonetheless, I appreciated deeply and sincerely in my heart those who have once with me. I treasured this moment very much and this is something that makes my life valuable.  

Each of the person I met has left an impact in my life. I learnt the meaning of life from each encounter. And it is this every encounter that I grow, growing to become a better person, a more understanding man. From all this experience of life, I developed myself to be a human that really takes the efforts to understand the feelings of the others, to be more considerate and to respect each and everyone as human being. 

Along the way, I have caused a lot of hard feeling towards the others. Deep inside my heart, I know I am wrong,  I am at fault. The courage to say "I am sorry." is never an easy thing to do, trust me, not at all. Due to my playfulness, my naughtiness, I sowed sorrow into the life of many. I created trouble to my family members. I planted hatred towards certain persons around me. I know, I am wrong, I am sorry. I am learning real hard to transform myself.

Humans are all connected by the intangible ties that are unseen to naked eyes, but they do exist. Friends in this life are not existing without reason nor they exist coincidentally. They are destined to be our friends in this life and that we shared something in common. We are here together to learn. Each encounter, treat it as if it is the last chance we are meeting each other. So treasure that encounter and not to regret thereafter. This is the great guidance given by my Sensei (Mentor), Ikeda Sensei. I craved it in my heart. 

  

Pillow

Bought myself a new pillow few days back with the hope that I will have better sleep at night. I have not been sleeping quite well recently. I'll feel dizzy every morning when I wake up. Not really sure the reason. Just hope to have better sleep with this new pillow I bought. Also, I bought new covers for my pillow and mattress and are blue in color - yeah, I love blue. 

I have been sleeping quite late (or should I say early in the morning). And I think is time for me to really adjust back my biological clock again. Yeah, again, I think I have been saying about this all the time, especially during holidays. Lets see how it goes. Trying to sleep early is really important for good health. I won't want to die so early anyway. ^^ 

Alright, not really sure whether I will be able to do it or not, just see how it goes tonight. 

Care less and I shall be more happy

I think I have been such a busy body to get into people's life too much. And people doesn't seem to appreciate at all. It will be best if I can just mind my own business, care my own things and step out from the lives of the others. And that will make a betterment to their lives.

At the same time, those who are not related to me, just get out of my life as well. My life isn't big enough to hold you nor sustain you. Get out~

8.2 - The History and I was part of it.

When it is still fresh in my mind, I think I better put it into words in case one day I am so reckless that I really forgot about this great day – 2nd August 2010. Today, University of Malaya has acknowledged the noble contribution of my mentor – Dr. Daisaku Ikeda. He was conferred with this great Honorary Degree of Doctor of Humanities. More or less, the ceremony was attended by 200 participants from SGM – mostly leaders. Sensei was not here to receive the award. Instead, his eldest son was here to receive on behalf of him.




Few weeks before this, I was first informed by a leader – Ooi Li Ting. I was made understand that this conferral ceremony was to be kept low profile – not to be over enthusiastic over it. So, most of us were having this great joy, quietly in our hearts. We were asked as well, to really think of the significance of this event especially at this year. Later, a few prayer objectives were laid down for the big success of this event.



Dr. Boey, an academician from UM had held a special meeting to meet most of our SD members in our Region 2. In this special meet, Dr. Boey shared with us the honor of this conferment with a few Gosho passages. I deeply impressed by his way of presenting his sharing. Indeed, I should say, it was a great piece of sharing – exposing the wisdom that he possessed through his practice all this while. Dr. Boey later spoke to us on our focus in chanting which he laid down 4:

1. To chant that the whole ceremony will be smooth and great success;

2. To chant that the weather on that day will be just nice;

3. To chant that people in UM and Malaysian society will be able, through this conferment, to have a deeper understanding of sensei and SGI; and

4. To earnestly chant that we can really deepen our bond with sensei and have a fresh determination in our practice and studies.

These had become our prayer objectives from that moment onward. Each student house had later agreed to have chanting sessions – once in the morning and once in the evening, each 1 hour – to chant according to these objectives. I should say it was really a hard challenge to do so. There were times when we have a full-1-hour-session with full attendance. There were times, as well, when there was only 1 or 2. The feeling of seeing most of the housemates waking up as early as 6 in the morning to perform the Morning Prayer was so touched. The feeling of each of us was really towards the same goal, the same objective, will eventually charge the life to the fullest – and that’s what made the day even greater.



At the same time, we were told to standby. Tasks were given from time to time. Sometimes it could be some clarifications on certain matters regarding the university. Sometimes, the tasks can be difficult and at time, seemed impossible. Nevertheless, we will still try to do the best, just to ensure that the ceremony will go smooth.



Seats were actually limited. Not all can actually get into the hall – Dewan Tunku Canselor – to witness the ceremony. However, Academy M was told that we were given a little privilege where we can send in as many names as we liked, and we will be given as many as possible seats. At the end of the day, we were given about 15 seats – a few of them were students from UTAR. I can feel that most of them really chanted hard to join this ceremony. They would like to be in there to feel the joyful process of conferment – recognition of the most prestigious university in Malaysia on our beloved sensei.



“Daisaku Ikeda!” – these words were announced once and my heart pondered fast. I was touched when the word by word was read by the Vice-Chancellor, Dr. Ghauth. Deep inside my heart, I congratulated sensei. His efforts were once again, recognized, acknowledged. I pledged in my heart, “I will not leave you (the path of mentor and disciple). I will, from now onwards, to fight like you, to fight with you. I want to deeply understand the meaning of “baton” that has passed to us and that I want to be the one that grab tight of this baton and truly engage myself in the path of world peace. I will study more and deepen my understanding about you and proudly share with people, your philosophy. I will proudly tell the world that you are my mentor for life and I will take all means to explain and share with people your great efforts and contributions in making this world a better place to stay.”



I heard people asking around, posing question like how do you feel? No single word can actually describe how I feel. But that doesn’t mean that I do not have any impression or what – my deep feeling will lead me to do the right things.